Pondering Life's Mysteries...

I ponder things.

Sometimes I tackle the big ones, like "Why are we here?" or to get deep about it, "Where is here, really?".

Sometimes I get really intense, focusing on things like "If a tree falls on a mime, does he make a sound, or, more importantly, does anyone care?"

If you're a mime, go ahead and yell at me from inside your little invisible box; I won't hear you.

But there is one issue that I have pondered since I was a child, one to which I have never received a satisfactory answer, and one that was brought back to the front of my mind (such as it is) this evening as I gave the boys their dessert:

Just what the h-e-double-hockey-sticks flavor of ice cream is Superman?!?

I mean, I understand the coloring: red, blue, and yellow, same as Superman's costume. That makes sense, and the colors are very obvious.

But what flavor is it????

What flavor is it??????

The name "Superman" is uselessly non-descriptive flavor-wise! I mean, yes, the word conjures up heart-warming images of truth, justice and the American way, but it doesn't say "tasty".

And tasting it to determine the flavor doesn't help in the least; it's totally unidentifiable. As a matter of fact, the only description I can come up with for it is "not chocolate".

Or maybe "not vanilla".

I don't know; one of those two.

Asking the clerk serving the brightly-colored concoction at the local Dapper Dan's does no good either. All I've ever gotten in response to this question, which I've been asking since I was five years old, is a glassy-eyed stare along with "Did you want one or two scoops?"

When I get to Heaven, I think this will be the second thing I ask God, right behind "What's up with the platypus?"

This is why I don't eat Superman ice cream that often anymore.

It angries up the blood...
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Thanks for reading my ranting,
Brad