Tuesday, September 14, 2010

Tuesday Treasures: Being a Quitter...

You may have noticed that I missed last week, and I do apologize for that. I got so busy that it was Friday before I realized that Tuesday had come and gone.

This week's installment is a little bit different.

Today I am celebrating being a quitter.

I quit smoking today.

Not for the first time; quitting smoking is relatively easy--staying quit is a different monster altogether.

One of the reasons that I've had so much trouble in the past is that I've always treated it like a habit that needs to be broken.

That's not true: smoking in an addiction, and needs to be treated as you would treat any other chemical dependency. It's no different than an alcoholic who quits drinking, or a heroin addict who fights to get clean.

Another reason I've had trouble, I believe, is that every time before, I've essentially kept it to myself. I've always figured, it's my addiction, I'll fight it on my own.

Which has led to failure. Every time.

Now, I'm standing up and declaring it out loud. I'm screaming from the virtual rooftops, "I AM A QUITTER!!"

I lost my dad because of smoking, and my boys deserve better than for me to put them through that. They need me to be around as long as I can be.

And, selfishly, I have a strong desire to be "not dead".

Hunter and Blake and I just went out to the grill and set fire to my last, almost-full pack.

I'm through. I was a smoker for at least twenty-one years (to be honest, I don't remember how old I was when I started, just that I was a full-blown addict in my senior year of high school), and I am through letting something as stupid as this stupid addiction to this stupid chemical control my life.

I've wasted a great deal of time and money on this stupidity over the years, and quite frankly, I have better things to spend both on.

I'm done being a slave to this.

It will be difficult. Nicotine has ruled my system (and my life) for so long that I don't remember what it was like to be in control of myself.

I guess in that respect, I'm not really quitting. The real "quit" was when I gave myself over to this insanity so long ago.

This isn't my "quit date".

It's my "start date".

I'm going to start being the real me again.

I'm looking forward to finding out what I'm like.

Thanks for reading my ranting,



  1. What a great post! Here's hoping you're a quitter for good this time. :)

  2. Congrats! I know how hard it is to quit, seeing my father go through the same process, and it helps when you have support! Good luck and I hope you manage to abolish the addiction completely. :)

  3. Way to go! Several of my other friends have chosen to be "quitters" over the past few years, too, one of whom did it for his baby girl.

    Love your declaration. I'll root for you every time you need a bit of encouragement beyond what your adorable boys will be giving you. Heck, you'll get a woot woot every now and then anyway. :D

  4. Yeah! Yippee!! Wahoo!!!

  5. Congrats, and good choice. Your boys will be proud of you dude.

  6. That's great to here! I wish you the best.

  7. *hear

    Just wanted to point out that people who have quit both heroine and a nicotine addiction say that smoking is harder. :/

  8. Thanks for the words of encouragement, everyone!
    T, you're right. It is incredibly difficult (I've had a couple of setbacks; not ashamed to admit it, and I just have to keep going from here). I'm considering starting heroin to get me off nicotine.;)

  9. Well. That is one idea. Though it might be hard getting your teeth back. :P

    And oh my... look at all my pretty typos. :P