Wednesday, January 26, 2011

Fun Things My Children Say...

Me: Blake, stop running in the house!

Blake: Wheeeeee!!!! Zoom!!! Zoom!!!

Starbuck: WOOF!! (I like you! You are the Small Human who drops food often!)

*CRASH!!!!*

Me: Blake, I said stop running around in the house with the dog!

Blake: *makes puppy dog eyes* But Dad, this is fun, and you like me to have fun because you love me, don't you?

Starbuck: BARK!! WOOF!!! (This is true, Big Human Who Takes Me Outside. It is fun because sometimes he has candy in his pockets that falls out, and then it is mine!)

Me: Yes, Blake, I love you, and I like for you to have fun. But there is not enough room in this house for you to run around like that, especially when a big dog like Starbuck is going to run around with you. I need for you to NOT run around the house.

Blake: But I have to, Dad. It's my destiny.

Me: Ah. Well. Carry on, then.

Blake: WHEEEEE!!!! ZOOOOOOMMMMM!!! ZOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMM!!!!!

Starbuck: WOOF!!! ROWR!!! (CANDY!!!!!!!!!!!!)

Me: *Sigh*
******************************

Me: *taking hat off after being out in snow* Ok, boys! Who wants some cereal?

Blake: ME!!! ME!!!!

Me: Hunter, what about you? You want a bowl of cereal?

Hunter: Wow, Dad. You're getting bald.

Me: *happy feelings draining, smile eroding* Hunter, I've been getting bald for a long time now.

Hunter: Yeah, I know. But you're really getting balder. Why are you crying?

Me: I'm not crying, Son. I'm weeping. There's a difference.

Hunter: Oh. Can I have some cereal now?

Starbuck: *running in from other room* WOOF!!!! (Cereal?)

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Thanks for reading my ranting,

Brad

6 comments:

  1. Whaahahahahaha!!!

    Oh my. I'm glad my son hasn't started coming up with those sorts of rationales yet (running in the house).

    And how just like a kid to unintentionally deflate our egos. hehe It probably won't be long before my son begins pointing out my gray hairs. At least I only have a couple so far.

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  2. LOL

    That was a wonderfully refreshing read for today ^_^

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  3. You are too funny, Brad. Thanks for the chuckles.

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  4. See, and you were excited about the snow day. All it got you was a sugar-high dog and a bowl full of tear-stained cereal. ;-)

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  5. Not a mother here, but as big sister I'm not sure what to do when my five year old sibling comes up to me and says, "Gee, Nicky... I love hugging you because your so big and soft." *eye roll*

    I laughed so hard when I read this! :D

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  6. Your talking dog is much less antagonistic than the one we used to have. Always judging.

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