Wednesday, January 26, 2011

Fun Things My Children Say...

Me: Blake, stop running in the house!

Blake: Wheeeeee!!!! Zoom!!! Zoom!!!

Starbuck: WOOF!! (I like you! You are the Small Human who drops food often!)


Me: Blake, I said stop running around in the house with the dog!

Blake: *makes puppy dog eyes* But Dad, this is fun, and you like me to have fun because you love me, don't you?

Starbuck: BARK!! WOOF!!! (This is true, Big Human Who Takes Me Outside. It is fun because sometimes he has candy in his pockets that falls out, and then it is mine!)

Me: Yes, Blake, I love you, and I like for you to have fun. But there is not enough room in this house for you to run around like that, especially when a big dog like Starbuck is going to run around with you. I need for you to NOT run around the house.

Blake: But I have to, Dad. It's my destiny.

Me: Ah. Well. Carry on, then.


Starbuck: WOOF!!! ROWR!!! (CANDY!!!!!!!!!!!!)

Me: *Sigh*

Me: *taking hat off after being out in snow* Ok, boys! Who wants some cereal?

Blake: ME!!! ME!!!!

Me: Hunter, what about you? You want a bowl of cereal?

Hunter: Wow, Dad. You're getting bald.

Me: *happy feelings draining, smile eroding* Hunter, I've been getting bald for a long time now.

Hunter: Yeah, I know. But you're really getting balder. Why are you crying?

Me: I'm not crying, Son. I'm weeping. There's a difference.

Hunter: Oh. Can I have some cereal now?

Starbuck: *running in from other room* WOOF!!!! (Cereal?)

Thanks for reading my ranting,



  1. Whaahahahahaha!!!

    Oh my. I'm glad my son hasn't started coming up with those sorts of rationales yet (running in the house).

    And how just like a kid to unintentionally deflate our egos. hehe It probably won't be long before my son begins pointing out my gray hairs. At least I only have a couple so far.

  2. LOL

    That was a wonderfully refreshing read for today ^_^

  3. You are too funny, Brad. Thanks for the chuckles.

  4. See, and you were excited about the snow day. All it got you was a sugar-high dog and a bowl full of tear-stained cereal. ;-)

  5. Not a mother here, but as big sister I'm not sure what to do when my five year old sibling comes up to me and says, "Gee, Nicky... I love hugging you because your so big and soft." *eye roll*

    I laughed so hard when I read this! :D

  6. Your talking dog is much less antagonistic than the one we used to have. Always judging.